Life's Temporary Setbacks

Co-written by: Dee and Jodie

 

(With an appearance by Chandi.)

 

 

Chandi glanced up from what he was reading when he sensed someone sliding into the booth across from him. Putting down the menu, he beamed a welcome. “Hello, Stewart. It’s nice of you to join me. How are things?”

Stewart smiled briefly at his longtime friend. “Hey, Chandi. I saw your bike outside. I hope you don’t mind the company because I could sure use some. What looks good today?”

“I’m undecided at the moment. Both the seafood platter and the chicken quesadilla look delicious.” Chandi closely studied the man sitting in front of him and frowned. “What gives, Stewart? You seem a little out of sorts. Are you having problems?”

Stewart used the brief distraction while the waitress took their drink orders to put his thoughts together. He needed to talk but also had to be sure he didn’t give too much information to his friend. He was still a bit tender from the spanking he’d received last night, when the discussion he and Lucas were having turned into a tantrum that would have made a two-year-old proud. And he never did get around to telling Lucas what the real problem was.

“It’s just that Lucas has been so busy lately with his new online venture, and what used to be one hour a couple of nights a week is now two or three hours a night.”

“Yeah, it sucks when your partner isn’t available when you feel you most want him,” Chandi sympathized. “Eric is off on another hunt for antiques; which is the reason I’m eating out and on my own. I promised to eat at least one substantial meal a day while he was away. I just didn’t feel up to cooking for myself.” He wasn’t comfortable with the thought of sharing more of the problem he and his partner had had lately with his poor eating habits. He certainly didn’t want to divulge how they had handled it.

“Jeez, Chandi. Do you really have to be told to eat? Doesn’t your stomach tell you when you’re hungry? Lucas can be a mother-hen, but he’s not that bad.” Chandi’s admission made Stewart laugh and he couldn’t help but tease him about it.

Chandi used the pretext of chewing his food to mull over how he wanted to respond. Deciding on the direct approach, he swallowed, shrugged his shoulders and honestly admitted the error in judgment on his part that had led to Eric’s assistance with making better choices. “My stomach can still send out proper messages. Unfortunately that doesn’t necessarily mean I answer appropriately. Such was the case a few weeks ago when I mistakenly thought I’d gained weight and wanted to drop a couple of pounds before my yearly physical. Eric didn’t exactly approve of my methods.”

“Yeah, isn’t that the way it usually goes? Always there when you do something you’d rather they not know about. When it comes to my health, Luc can be such a Top... er, total worry-wart.” Stewart quickly ducked his head to hide his reddening cheeks and hoped Chandi hadn’t noticed what he’d said.

Chandi toyed with the straw in his glass and studied his friend. He had immediately zeroed in on Stewart’s slip of the tongue and was quickly realizing the other man was embarrassed by his unintentional blunder. He thought it best to ease the situation by being as straight forward as possible.

Clearing his throat and leaning forward, Chandi softy announced, “Eric is a Top too, Stewart. I learned of my needs a few years ago and consider myself lucky to have a partner who loves me enough to willingly meet those needs. Right now, even though Eric is not with me, he is still in charge so-to-speak. My job is extremely demanding and I think I do it well. But once the uniform comes off, I am more than grateful to let Eric take over the decision making in our personal lives. I am very comfortable with who I am and most definitely with who Eric is.”

Seeing the remaining look of uncertainty in Stewart’s eyes, Chandi went on. “You and I are not the only ones here in Jade Heights who live this lifestyle. You’d be surprised at how many do.” Chandi’s smile widened when he saw his friend blink in astonishment.

Stewart just stared at Chandi, trying to take in everything he had just been told. His first reaction after this revelation was to deny his blunder and change the subject. He didn’t know how Lucas would react to him revealing that private side of their lives, but also because he didn’t want to be seen as weak. He knew what spin some people might put on his place, the Brat’s place, in these relationships: juvenile and incapable. 

If he wasn’t being teased, he could definitely use some advice. He felt like Lucas’ job was pulling him away far too often these days, but each time Stewart tried to talk to Lucas, his temper got the better of him. He decided to take a chance on Chandi’s honesty. Though he found he couldn’t make eye contact, looking up only as far as Chandi’s top button. 

“Chandi, you better not be making a joke at my expense, because what you just said is what I have with Lucas. It’s not that I can’t guide my own life; I can, but I’m drawn to and respond to the strength and dominance that Lucas wears like a coat. So you, umm, you really let Eric take charge; to make the decisions?  Decisions you are fully capable of making and you don’t mind?”

“Not only don’t I mind, Stewart, I requested it. I trusted Eric to do what was right by me and he has never once betrayed that trust.” Making note of his friend’s continued discomfort, Chandi set about putting Stewart’s mind at ease. “Look, you and I have known each other most our lives. We grew up together, were in some of the same classes in schools, and attended the same church. Although not exactly nerds, we sure as hell weren’t part of the popular ‘in’ group, were we?” It was a rhetorical question so Chandi forged ahead. “You are the only one I’ve told about this. It appears to be just one more thing we have in common. I would never share this info with anyone else.” Chandi hoped Stewart realized he was making a vow concerning both their situations and not just his own.

“For me it was more Lucas’ idea, but I agreed with him. It works for us too. Lucas can be intense at times, but I wouldn’t change what we have for anything. I like that he is in charge, but I’m wondering if I sometimes take it for granted. Lately he has been so busy he doesn’t have time for us anymore and I’m really beginning to resent it.” 

“Yeah, I know what you mean. I kind of have to put up with Eric being gone at times even though I understand the need for his business to expand.” Chandi’s voice was sympathetic. “I guess from your demeanor that you haven’t been successful in getting your feelings across to Lucas, right?”

“No. In fact by the time I get around to bringing it up, I’m so mad that I end up sounding petty and whiny, and that never ends well. Then I won’t talk further about what is really bothering me. Like last night, I just accused him of using his time with the group as a way of avoiding helping out with the after dinner clean-up and wanting to avoid spending time with me. This online venture was only supposed to be a short amount of time in the evenings, but now he spends a couple of hours on it every night. By the time he gets offline, he’s either too tired, it’s time for bed, or he’s upset and doesn’t want to talk about what happened. I don’t know what to do about it. Do you have any ideas?”

Chandi held up his empty pop glass to indicate he wanted a refill. When another beverage appeared in front of him and the waitress had moved on, he slowly shook his head. “I’d say the only thing you can do is talk to him. Only try harder to keep your cool. Don’t wait until you’re so pissed off, you can’t explain yourself. I know for a fact, that is exactly what Eric would expect me to do if I was having a problem with something; especially if it concerned us and our relationship.”

“That’s easier said than done. He tried to talk to me about the activities. He said the group had lost focus and even after repeated attempts at sending notes reminding the membership that the point was to discuss financial investments and not for their personal needs, nothing changed. And I barely listened. He had spent far longer online than our original agreement and I was too angry to listen. I know I should have been supportive but all I could think about was myself. Afterwards, I apologized but still never told him what was really bothering me.  How do I say I want him to end this when he was so excited about the idea of helping people out? I really don’t want him to stop, just spend more time with us.”

“Maybe if you showed a bit of interest and made a suggestion or two, things would improve. Start off by asking questions. Lucas just might need a listening ear. You know; a sounding board or something. Can’t hurt to try, right?”

“Well, I don’t know anything about the financial side of it, but it can’t hurt to be there with him and maybe try to facilitate the meetings. If nothing else, it would have us spending a bit of time together.”  Stewart grabbed the two checks that the waitress had placed on the table and then smiled at Chandi.  “I probably should get home. Do you mind if I pick this up?  It’s the least I can do for the help you’ve given tonight. And maybe sometime in the near future, we could talk more about our lifestyle. It would be great to have someone to discuss it with; maybe some words of wisdom to keep me out of trouble?”

“You’re welcome to pick up my check any time, my friend,” Chandi laughed, grabbing up his helmet and sliding out of the booth. “We can meet up as often as we’re both free to do so. Meanwhile, good luck with your plans.” He waited while Stewart paid the bill, then they walked outside together. “See you soon,” Chandi exclaimed as he waved and drove off.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

As he pulled into the driveway, Stewart still had no clear idea of how he would approach Lucas. He also wasn’t sure of the reception he would receive after just leaving a note that Lucas’ dinner was in the oven and that he would be eating out tonight. It’s not that they didn’t eat apart, but usually they discussed it in advance. 

As he came into the kitchen it was obvious that Lucas had not come out to eat yet, and no evidence that Lucas had even read the note. As he took the plate out of the oven he found his anger rising at not even being missed, but then stamped hard on those feelings to calm down. He knew now how he could get Lucas’ attention and perhaps help him out. 

Stewart threw away the dried up remains of the casserole on the plate and set to making a sandwich with a small salad of cut up fruit on the side. As he walked into the study with the tray of food, he saw Lucas sitting there with his head resting on his hands and a very frustrated look on his face. 

“Hey babe, can you take a quick break for a meal and conversation with someone who really misses spending time with you? I won’t name any names but it’s me.” Stewart smiled warmly to take the sting out of his words as he pushed the laptop out of the way and placed the tray in front of Lucas.

“I have a better idea,” Lucas smiled up at his partner. He reached over and closed the page he was on, before pulling Stewart down onto his lap and kissing him soundly. “That group has taken up enough of my time as late and I am beginning to think it was an error on my part to even start it.”

Just then his stomach growled, causing both men to laugh. “I wonder if that’s a sign of agreement or a complaint to let me know it’s empty and wants refueling.”

Stewart reluctantly slid off Lucas’ lap to allow him to eat, and pulled up a side chair to sit near him. “All right, you eat and let me tell you about my plan. I don’t want you to give up the group. Well, I did in the beginning. But I spent some time with Chandi tonight and he gave me some ideas that I hope you’ll be open to. It will allow us to spend time together in the evenings and maybe cut down on frivolous the conversations that are taking place on your group.” Stewart smiled a little guiltily as he continued. “But first I want to apologize for leaving tonight. I did leave a note but it doesn’t appear that you saw it. And I know I could have interrupted to tell you I was leaving, but at the time I was mad that you were still online. I know that’s not how we handle things, but at the time I just couldn’t see straight. I hope you aren’t angry.”

“I’m not at all angry, sweetheart. I actually heard you go out and it had crossed my mind to go after you, until I realized you might like a cooling off period. I actually had to take one myself this evening due to the needless number of postings on the group.” Lucas pointed at the half empty bottle of water that sat on the desk as he paused to take a large bite of his sandwich and wash it down. “I had all but decided to close it down but for the fact that there are still members who need my help. I guess we can use it as a new activity of sorts that we can do together.”  

Stewart’s smile was huge as he launched into his plan. “Well, I know I’ve been resenting the time you spend with these people. But if you want to keep the group active, then I want to be a part of it. I haven’t really investigated how I would do this, but what would you think about me being a moderator of sorts? You could introduce me to the group and explain that I won’t be answering questions about the financial side. However, if the group continues to get sidetracked onto issues that don’t relate to the reason for you being online, I would step in as a facilitator to move the group back on track. Just remind them that time is short and that if they have personal issues to discuss, they can contact their friends through off-group emails. Of course I would need to work on my approach, but it would save you from losing control and being the heavy.”

“Hmm, so you’d be policing the group for me, huh? Sounds like a good plan; I like it. I’ll let you know when things are beginning to veer off track. Then if you feel comfortable enough, you can step in. Maybe now would be a good time to clarify the purpose of the group and the somewhat less than necessary subject matter that seems to creep in from time to time. Uncontrolled, it kind of develops a life of its’ own. I don’t always catch it until it is too late.” Lucas kissed his partner once again and turned the laptop to face them both. “Ready?”

“Ready!” Stewart enthusiastically declared as he shifted his chair closer. “Though after tonight, I think I should use my own laptop to access the group. That way if you are typing a response to someone, I can step in without interrupting you.”

“You’ll have to join up first,” Lucas reminded him as he signed back into the group. “For now, I’ll just explain some of the group’s purpose. I had originally set it up as a method to keep folks informed of their mortgage and/or loan options in a more relaxed setting than going into a bank or finance company. Over time I expanded it, upon request, to include discussions pertaining to debt resolutions, asset management, investment opportunities, various insurance plans, and small business ideas, to mention a few. It was a question about wills and probates that first caused things to go a little haywire. People began talking about personal experiences other than financial issues, which in turn developed in small side-chats of sorts that had a tendency to upset some of the others. This is a fire that took me three quarters of an hour to put out earlier and will give you an idea of what we have to watch out for.”

“All right, I can join. But it would be easier if you sent me an invitation. That way my acceptance will be automatic.” Stewart kept his eyes on the computer as he confessed, “Luc, you know I don’t understand the financial side, so I can’t be of any help there. But I’ll do my best to keep your group from wandering off the subject. All I want is to be able to have some time with you in the evenings and if that means spending an hour an evening watching you talk shop, it’s worth it. Maybe I’ll even learn a thing or two.”

“The invite is a good idea, sweetheart. However, I am no longer going to devote more than an hour or so a couple of evenings a week to the group. If members need more help than I am able to give, they’ll have to find it elsewhere; even if it means they have to pay for it.”

Lucas took a moment to send the invitation before turning off the computer for the second time this evening. “I think it is time I deploy my time in a much more pleasant activity. And that is doing whatever comes to mind when I am with you.” He pulled Stewart onto his lap and began nuzzling his partner’s neck. “I owe you big time, precious Brat of mine. I’ve been far too negligent lately, and I’m so very sorry. I know better and should have put a stop to this foolishness a while back. I plan to make it up to you in spades.”

Stewart tilted his head to allow Lucas better access. “I know you aren’t perfect and I know you didn’t mean to spend more time with them than you had originally planned. I could have been a bit more understanding and maybe more honest in telling you I was beginning to resent the time you were spending on-line. Instead I made it harder for you and kept you guessing at what my mood of the day would be. I’ll accept your apology if you’ll accept mine?” He didn’t wait for an answer as Lucas turned his attention to some of Stewart’s more sensitive spots. “Mmmm yes, right there.”

A bit of nibbling on his ear-lobe accompanied by a soft growl was the only answer given. It was acknowledged as a confirmation of agreement. Lucas’ hands slowly stripped his partner of clothing while his lips never strayed far from the adored body he was uncovering.

Aside from hungry moans and groans from both men, the only other sounds were the unzipping of zippers and the popping of a couple of Lucas’ shirt buttons as he worked rapidly to rid himself of his own attire.

He stood up and pushed Stewart steadily towards the leather sofa where he continued his assault.

Lucas felt certain they’d be back on the right track in no time and he trusted that his partner felt the same. He truly believed that oft times these little setbacks made a relationship stronger.

The End